Memories

No baby yet.  Most people wouldn't be too upset with that if they weren't past their due date, but I was sure with the amount of procrastination going on in our house with the preparation for the new baby that it would indeed be early.
And I know that in general it's better for the baby to not come early.  But it's getting hard to take care of Bella.  And it's not even the carrying around the 33 pound dead weight of Bella (except when going up and down the stairs), it's the bending over and trying to pick her up from the floor, and the worst is trying to support her on my lap when there just isn't anyplace for her to sit.  And of course there is the general uncomfortableness of being this pregnant.
But if you want to know the real reason I am ready to have this baby, it's because I'm anxious to meet the little person growing inside of me.  I would like to know if it's a girl or a boy, being that my lovely husband wouldn't let me find out.  But most importantly I want to make sure the baby is healthy and everything will be okay this time around.
I start to remember my delivery of Bella.  Of being hooked up to a million machines and the whole labor and delivery taking forever.  Of her having a short little cry after being born, them handing her to me for all of 3 seconds and then needing to rush off and work on her.  And my first impression of Bella being in my arms was that she had such a pronounced cone head.  They worked on her in the room with us for a short while and they had to rush her down to NICU.  Jesse went with them, and the doctors and nurses had to finish up things with me.  I remember Jesse being lost and going in between my room and the NICU.  They would occasionally kick him out of the NICU to do different procedures and the doctors would tell him different things they found.  He would have to come back and report the different things to me with such a look of despair and disbelief.  They then informed us Bella would be transported to Children's Mercy downtown.  It wasn't until I had a brief time alone that I even allowed myself to cry.
This was the only picture taken of Bella and us at the hospital I delivered her at (they were in a little bit of a hurry and didn't allow us to take another one, even though my eyes were closed).

Jesse decided to stay with me in the hospital since they were going to release me the very next morning.  I was in a huge hurry to get out as I knew our new baby girl was all alone in a hospital without her mother or father.  I cried most of the way up to Children's Mercy. And of course life went on, as most of you know who read the blog.  But that is my memory of giving birth, and I'm ready to replace it with a new one....any day now would be great!